Of alter egos and food battles – 2

Read part 1 here

How does one fight back from the desolate depths of heinously blasphemous gluttony?

Is there redemption?

Can one survive the brutal onslaught of it’s inner food demons?

Folks, it’s been a little over two weeks. Two weeks since I gave in to all my inner food monsters (The Dairy Demon, the Bakery Monster, The Shawarma Fiend and some other unnamed miscellaneous creatures). It started off fairly unobtrusively. I was “chilling” apparently.

It started one morning, when on the way to airport my lovely Bakery Monster decided cupcakes with extra sweet icing (which is just a fancy term for plain ‘ol butter and sugar) would make an excellent pre- dawn snack choice. I then gobbled a humungous breakfast of buttery, sugary, syrupy crepes at the airport, followed by the cold, hard, bland fare they served on board. At transit, the burgers called out to me….

It has all gone downhill from there.

About three days into this sinful existence (where my gut overrode my brain and was given free reign), I started calling this “an experiment”. I vocally declared that I wanted to see how far things would go. Few days later, I walked around muttering that exercise was getting boring and I needed to pile on some pounds so that I would have fun losing it. Twisted logic you say? Like most addictions, I needed an excuse for my addiction.

I have been feeding the Bakery Monster every morning and evening. Almost every night, The Shawarma Fiend has his fill. The Dairy Demon needs no excuse, he has a boundless existence; all in the name of “calcium for a lactating mama”.

I have had Biriyani for lunch, for ten straight days. I then missed a day, thanks to some unforeseen, insurmountable circumstances. I got back on track the next day, and have been on it since then.

I eat a Shawarma, every night. The justification given- I’m trying to find the best one in town!

I binge on muffins and croissants every morning, away from the prying eyes of The Mister; who is still in bed then.

I eat what my heart desires and till my gut says stop.

I had buttered toast and muffins and coffee for breakfast yesterday. Biriyani for lunch, Shawarma and tea for the evening and take- out pizza and bottomless soda for dinner. Pre- snooze snack- Pineapple preserve filled doughnut with generous sprinkling of icing sugar.

And there it is. My ugly, embarrassing secret is out.

Go ahead Mister, snigger away to glory. Make all the sarcastic, snide remarks that you want. Gloat and preen.

They say the key to ridding an addiction is to first admitting you have a problem. We have a problem on our hand folks. A big one.

I have to drag all these demons back into their cages (for they can only be caged not killed) before they ravage my bloodstream and pummel my conditioned body into fatty submission. I wonder what damage has been done already. Will the scale bear any consequences? Or should I get a lipid profile done stat?

Either way, all my lovely, friendly monsters- It’s time. I love you and shall miss you, but tis time. I let you run amok and fill your souless selves with your drugs and vices of choice. No more. For a while at least. Till then, hasta la vista baby!

Till next time..

Dr J, in association with all her alter egos.

15 Comments

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  1. Haha. Hope you’ve enjoyed the feast! Sounds like you have had fun.

  2. was wondering why my comments were coming in as “anonymous”!!

    if one were to track the prices of shawarma over the years from 3 qr in the early 90’s to 6-7 qr now, it’s a cause of shawarmic concern as well.. back then, a common complaint was that the veggies were more than the chicken / meat shreds.. can’t say that for now with the increasing price of veggies. chicken / meat shreds are more than the veggies or veggies are absent altogether in the shawarma of some places like Petra..

    • Aah! So it IS YOU! I had a sneaky suspicion, I played along thinking maybe you guys were in a “incognito” mood…

      Well, I wouldn’t know about the 90s, but I do see where you are coming from. There’s been drastic changes just in the last couple of years. Maybe it’s time for the shawarma connoisseurs to pitch in and do something- sign a petition perhaps. Or maybe, we can find a sponsor and…….

      • :)) it would be one of those “committees” that would have “n+1” suggestions and not able to reach a decision on how can the best shawarma be made! one wants it to be served hot, the other wants french fries, another wants ketchup, another wants garlic, another wants pickles, another wants spicy bread, some prefer toasted, another wants it on kubbus but then the neighbour wants it on rumali roti like bread and so on and on.. !

  3. and.. which place has the best shawarma, as of last night’s gastronomic outing?

    • Dry and almost crunchy- Noor Pastry, Muntazah. Opp. Al Meera.

      Juicy and value for money (but with long queues)- A small, can’t- remember- the name- cafeteria off Immigration roundabout…

      • ok. this is a new place for me. shall try it as soon as i am off my diet.. 🙂 Have you tried the shawarma from Sultan restaurant in Al Sadd. its at the beginning of al nasser street – the street which has turkey central restaurant..one of the few places that spreads garlic sauce on the bread, and then toasts the shawarma sandwich 🙂 mouth watering!!

      • Oh yes. I have! I first got pissed that it looked “brown” … but I loved the extra garlic flavor. I seriously need to click pictures and note down names of all the sharwarma places in town. I spent 7 months (post the nausea ridden first trimester) hunting down almost every small/ big/ dingy/ clean/ not- so- clean shawarma stop in Doha. It was my one and ONLY pregnancy craving!

      • what’s value for money now? is it proportional to the shawarma sandwich filling or length / shape of the sandwich bread.. a few shawarma places in the gulf cinema signal area do put in green chillis for that extra kick but their tahina sauces have been of doubtful quality on at least 2 occasions .. jalapenos have gone almost extinct from the shawarma places.. and i don’t understand the need to include cold dry french fries which takes away the shawarma taste altogether!!

      • This comment was lying in the spam folder! And hey, I quite enjoy the occasional fry amid the overwhelming chickenness!

      • differing tastes.. this goes on to explain why there can never be the perfect shawarma..

      • Yup! I still hope to find The One though. And only the finest fires are acceptable, not more than one too!

    • Noor Pastry once had the best in town. (in my humble opinion). The administration had changed hands now, and that unfortunately means the cooks/ shawarma experts have changed too. Now they make ho- hum ones…

      • inconsistency in taste is a constant & common thing in doha restaurants, irrespective of management. what tastes good at 7 pm today need not be the same taste later..

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