Wanting to be in control is a basic human attribute. Needing to be in control is a specific personality trait. An annoying trait on most occasions, and crippling at others. It is a need that consumes you from the inside; an ever- present, relentless, churning desire to be on top of things. To know what happens when, how and where. And to be able to plan for it, and see it to conclusion in exactly the way you deem fit.
Even the most meagre of modifications conspired either by circumstance or by fellow human intervention produces a restlessness within that cannot be easily contained. It might ruin your hour, day or week and destroy other concomitant arrangements that you might have laid in place.
Why then do we hold on to this vile desire?
Why do we subject ourselves to this vicious, tortuous circle of plans and failed plans?
What is the harm in letting go?
The more I let go, the more I am in control. I can control my being and thoughts without regard to external influence. I am no longer an underling to fate and chance.
The more I let petty matters slide, the more self-mastery I attain. The restlessness abates every time I tell myself I don’t care.
The more important things will always be important. And I can expend my inner resources on them more efficiently once I decide to let go of inconsequential matters.
And so, here I am. A woman who no longer obsesses over laundry. Or the “grocery shop day”. This woman’s inner state is not ruffled by a ruffled bed, or made unkempt by an unkempt home.
The art of letting go, is the key to freeing myself from the vagaries and mercy of Messrs Chance & Circumstance.
Till next time.